notes from
the MUCK . . .

How does your garden grow? With muck, muck and more muck! I spent much of today finishing the final muck box and then shifting muck from one box to the next. The first box, which the Big Lad is enthusiastically pointing out, has been rotting down for two years now and once we’d removed the top quarter of unrotted material, we found we’d hit the pay dirt.

Saturday, October 15, 2005


On the day that I left the U.S. to return home to the U.K. i lost my mp3 player. This loss confounded what was already a very emotional experience; I had just put some new tunes on there; and was even going to try and get a playlist specially for me rolling out of town including "here i go again on my own", and "London calling"...Swish eh?
Upon returning I found life pretty hard to adjust to; something i blame wholly on the absence of my mp3 player. I thought of all the tunes i could put on it; all the journeys on the underground that it would keep me company, all "the burns" it would help me feel, or run through while i was jogging (here i go again on my own would've done wonders, as would of the superman theme)...instead, I hung my head and looked at photos of me during the time I had the mp3 player; and wallowed in the fact that i would never be that man again.

Then my girlfriend rang me and told me she had found it and would send it over. Happiness has no end.

A week after she sent it; I felt that it would arrive anytime...Every morning i would excitedly run to check out the mail and see if it had come; everytime i trudged back despondent and mp3less. Days turned into weeks, weeks turned into a little over a month; and just around Friday, i lost hope in it ever coming; and wondered what I would have to do to claim the insurance for it. Enter mp3 player, stage left.
So many wondrous moments, new songs to put on and play, so many reasons to make up in order to go for a walk (not a run, i don't feel ready for that)....aaaaahhhh, life is sweet.....

Sweet as it is; it's not as good with it here, as it was bad when it wasn't. Maybe its just me, i think that I am one thing away from ultimate happiness. When I was 8, it was a dart board. I told my mum i would never be bored if i had one. Likewise with the Amiga 500 and the amazing back to the future II game where you got to ride on hover boards...then the Super Nintendo...then the puppy...all these i had, and still, still, they didn't enter my head whilst I was waiting for my mp3 player...

What will it take for me/anyone to be satisfied...I think if I could have one wish (somewhat material but encroaching on the territory of fantasy), I think i would like to be able to growl like a wild animal, a puma or a tiger; something like that. I got the idea when I was watching Teen Wolf and how, when he got pissed off he would roar; starting by emitting a low guttural rumbling from throat to a full fledged SNAAAAARRRLLLL!!! YEAH! Just think of the words we waste trying to describe certain people or situations when we could just growl...similarly, how many times would you like to see some dick head strutting down the road, creased khakis cutting through the air like a cape cod catamaran; sweater draped over shoulders (hey, he's casual), sense of entitlement dangling from his belt, bush stickers on his SUV...sucking in precious air...he sees you and instantly judges the fact your trousers are not pressed, you didn't spend 5 hours preening your hair, you are not as wealthy as him, and you believe gay people should be able to get it on. No need for silent fury; ROOOAAARRRRRR....and then, just like in teen wolf, see him take a dump in his pristine khakis...sweet.

If anyone thinks they would be eternally satisfied with the acquistion of just one thing; post it in comments. If you don't, shame on you. If you're already satisfied, good for you.

Enough jibber jabber, but think about it; roaring can bring great happiness.