Hey everyone. As you may know, every so often I have to delve into the gargantuan postal department here in the Muck to look through the various correspondence from our vast readership. It's cold here, a little lonley, the world of tweets, blogs, and face book updates seems a long long way a way from these hallowed depths I can tell you.
Anywho, if you'll cast your memories back to the 2007, you may remember I brought you news on the hot dog speed eating contest
, in particular, the plight of one man, Kobayashi, who finished second. Many of you wrote in to see what had happened to this tragic hero, whether he had gone on to take the covetted title
Well people, I can tell you that things have not panned out so smoothly for our wiener chomping chum.
He managed to get himself arrested for trying to partake in an eating competition he was not registered for. That, in itself, is cause for a tear or two. However, looking at the reason he was not registered, I was horrified to see that there is a Federation for these freaks of nature, named Major League Eating
. Think how many people this employs. Wonder that this is not the only body of its kind, and that Kobayashi did not want to sign with them as if he did so then they would prohibit him, BAN him, from entering other competitions.
Also something to ponder is the chant that went up from the crowd when Kobayashi, "The Tsunami", tried to take the stage illegally, "Let him eat, let him eat!!!". I imagine Kabayashi's chest puffing with pride, his eyes filling with tears, and his heart brimming with righteous indignation as the words emboldened his pasion and cause. Far be it for me to judge, but perhaps they would've been better off saying something like "Hey, dude, it's been like, 9 years since you won this thing. Leave it to that nerdlinger "Joey Jaws". Run free while you're still young." You know, something snappy like that.
So, tonight, I urge you all to spare a thought for Kobayashi, and hope that one day he breaks free of the grip of the mania that is speed eating.
Labels: come big or don't come at all Kobayashi, Recap